I am a free dreamer,walker and thinker..
Dancing with words,imagining a soulful and peaceful life..Being alone makes you feel independent!
Esra Şeker/ Teacher of English
©All Rights Reserved
I am a free dreamer,walker and thinker..
Dancing with words,imagining a soulful and peaceful life..Being alone makes you feel independent!
Esra Şeker/ Teacher of English
©All Rights Reserved
Today , the human’s suffer starts with getting apart from wild nature. He finds himself like a jailed in an artificial life. Maybe, old days were really gold days. Throughout history,humankind struggled to survive, and his instincts are programmed to stay alive. Of course , the life was harder but simple to live centuries ago. Today everything has changed and human nature highly got effects !
Initially, the humankind came to the Earth naked , then he chased on nature with his instincts. He observed the nature , animals, plants and the weather. He felt his hungry stomach, then tasted the animals , plants. After that, wild nature showed its cruel face to him. He got cold and hot.. The wild animals made him to built a shelter . He hid behind the fire which meant power to him at nights .. By the way, time has changed, and the humankind has changed with it. The humanity built their own civilizations , and today we are in amazing and incredible life conditions. In modern world, we are in easy and more comfortable life, but maybe we are not aware of being lost in it. We live unconsciously , and the ropes of our life aren’t on our hands anymore.
Moreover, comfortable life conditions are killing us slowly. We lose our power of struggle due this comfort. As we move away from nature, we move away from the sound of our soul. Especially, what happened to woman? Are the women really satisfied with their lives ? Are the new world design actually feeding our, the women’s inner world ? I think they are not ! Because, the women lost their real and pure instincts with capitalist world design. Furthermore, they are loosing blood away from their wild natural. Let me show you some points, then tell me if you are agree or not.
– The women have been suppressed and disturbed in terms of socially, culturally and economically throughout history.
– The women have lost their wild instincts which are infinite power and creavity.
– The women have been departed from their wild nature due to some obligations organised by society, especially by the men. For example, the statements like “ A woman has to be decent!” “ A woman has to live in a preserved circle !” “ A woman has to make the others satisfied and happy!”
– The women have been restricted by society and traditions.
– The women have felt weakness and insufficiency due to expectations imposed to them.However, they have had their self – power since they were born. This power has already gifted to them by Creator.
Well .. How can the women turn to their natures ? When we look at ‘ The Woman Who Run with the Wolves by Clarrissa Rinkola Este’s ’ , we can see some attractive solutions.. According to Este’s ,
– Within every woman there is a wild creature.
– They have ageless knowing, good instincts with awesome creativity.
– They should reconnect with their healthy instinctual properties of the wild woman , but unfortunately they are endangered species!
– They are for working on their identity and self – worth, self- confidence, and healing their wounds inherited from their ancestors. She argues that the unrestrained power and creativity lying within women lies in the natural wilderness of wolves.
Let’s look at statements of Este’s ;
1 “ To be ourselves causes us to be exiled by many other and get to comply with what other want causes us to be exiled from ourselves.”
It’s really stunning! Today’s woman are quite busy with others’ thoughts and expectations. Recent increase in aesthetic operations show this very well.. Most of us are running to reach ideal body forms. All our efforts to be beautiful rather than healthy. Especially, we can’t stop using face- filters on our social medias, because we live according to the artificial beauty patterns drawn us!
2 “ Our secret hunger for being loved is not beautiful. Our disuse and misuse of love is not beautiful. Our lack of loyalty and devotion is unloving our state of separation from the soul is ugly, based on psychological warts, inadequacies and childhood fancies.” ( Dr. Este’s )
When we read these words , desire to be loved is inevitable but misuse of it causes us to be departed from our soul, our inner peace. Because, the passion of being loved is like a hunger animal, and unless we love our wildself , we can’t be satisfied with the others’ loves. Dr. Este’s suggests the women to sign a peace with their wild woman archetype, and she resembles the woman to the wolf. Moreover, she stages on some similarities between two species.
“ Healthy Women and Wolves :
They are sensible and severe.
They have intence devotion and performer spirit.
They are good at adopting changing conditions and being loyal to their partners and babies.”
In other words, she draws an archetype who is related with her wild nature and based on emotions when making choices. The woman havim , confidence manages to exist with their all good instincts. In fact, we can escape the fear imposed throughout history with our courage .I must admit that this self- awareness is really hard and needs to have warrior soul in modern life.
Do we really have to live the rules imposed to us?
Of course,we don’t!
Let’s make peace with our white hair, body forms and wrinkled faces! Also, according to Este’s , the woman’s smile makes her attractive and sexy. She doesn’t need any artificial beauty. Because, her real beauty comes from the power of her nature. She can survive alone , fearless and powerful with her wild soul like wolf. Maybe, the fear influenced inside of us as a result of borders drawn by environment. However, we are beautiful and precious because we are human , especially as a woman!
I leave you alone with lyrics of running with the wolves by Aurora .
Go row the boat to safer grounds
But don’t you know we’re stronger now
My heart still beats and my skin still feels
My lungs still breathe, my mind still fears..
I’m running with the wolves tonight!
As a last, we must regain our power which we have already had as soon as possible, and we should believe that we are strong as result of our nature!
© lhpinhan 2019
“Do you love me ivy?
Is the path confusing ? Whatever..
We got used to it, maybe it is lovely saucy
You will say kill it, but it will not die!”
These great lyrics belongs to Turkish singers, composers Mabel Matiz & Sıla. It is ivy . I suggest you to watch this amazing song, even twice or three times. In each listening, you start to feel your soul.. It takes you away from this world, then you step in a peaceful and colorful atmosphere. It smells like Mesopotamia and Anatolia which are cradles of old civilizations. You put yourself into the lover’s shoes in video song.
Do you know the region in which the video song taken ? It is Döşemealtı, Antalya in Turkey. This district turns into a rug field in July ,and known as the northern star of Antalya. The rugs are laid for pastelization of colors on this region which has low humidity and high solar ratio. Firstly, hundreds of hand-woven or machine weaving rugs and carpets are washed in sterile pools, later they wait under sun from one to three months. Afterthat, they are exported to Iran, Afghanistan and Europe as well as Turkey .
Beyond all,these authentic rugs have own their languages in fact. Most of the patterns and colors carry some messages. They are great pieces of human throughout the history. For instance, meanings of some colors:
Blue – trust
Green – prosperity
What about patterns? Of course, they’re also full of signs;
Eagle figure – power and force
Earing motif – the message of girls are at the marriage age to their parents 🙂
It’s really silent, soulful and respectful communication. Moreover, ram horns figure represents the woman and man .
It’s the most ancient and common figure . Unfortunately when we turn to today, meaning of objects is getting lost day by day. Whereas, the energy of colors and patterns can change our auras; rather, some recent scientific works agree on their affects to our souls.
To sum up, if I turn to head, the singer lies like a figure of rug in video song.
Maybe, when a lover falls in love , he goes on a journey.. A long journey.. Who knows where it starts and ends? The lover leaves himself/herself under the love sun, because the gleam of it is a unique cure . Catching love is the beginning of this journey, then a bitter parting follows the lovers. In one part of lyric, the lover separates out beloved;
“We’re torn up just like a paper
You have the lines, I’m all the white spaces”
The lover turns into a hand-woven rug which is waiting for being pastel and having a shiny surface under the sun.Furthermore, the love sun gives its colors and patterns to the lovers who are consent of everything coming from love! Shortly, the love makes our souls beautiful even if it ends with an separation.
©2019 lhpinhan (All Rights Reserved)
When I was a child, I used to lying down under stars at summer nights. I would try to catch muse of stars! The stars were my magic world. Whenever I gazed at them, thrilling, mostly weird stories used to rush to my brain. I wasn’t alone at those times. My sister was with me , because she was so eager to hear that she would take place next to me. I really liked to imagine and tell stories at summer nights under stars. Moreover, I wanted my sister to close her eyes ,and imagine the sceneries, characters while I was telling. Her curious eyes which was getting bigger during scary parts made me more ambitious to tell stories. After a while, we started to believe that heroes of my stories could be real and talk about them. It was our secret fun. Beyond all, the stars were indispensable for us, because we used to choose the brightest star and give a name to it. Then, we would draw invisible lines among the stars and combine them. These lines would turn into some images which were flowers, faces, animals, or objects. While gazing , when a star fell ,we used to shout :” Look! It slid! Somebody passed away..” We really didn’t know why we thought like that. We might have heard from rumours among adults. But we believed this and tried to find our stars which would slide if we died. Maybe, we mostly kept the biggest one because of this reason. However, I used to give the brightest and biggest one to my sister as an elder, but I was a child too. I chose the smaller one next to the biggest. We should have been together on the sky, because being a sister required this. After a short childish mourning , we used to talk about good things. I would tell story and wait for hero of my story to come into my dream!
Whenever I go to this childhood memory, I remember ‘ A Child’s Dream of A Star (by Charles Dickens) . This story is special for me , because it’s so feeling and touching to hearts. A brother and sister’s musing on life and death surrounds me. It is so charming and heart- warming that it takes me to the my childhood. Of course, the end of story is misery, and a brother’s grief is extremely sincere.
(illustrator Hammattt Billings)
Furthermore, their wandering around at nights by thinking about life, nature and death is incredibly sophisticated for kids. In the story, there is a shining star in the sky. It is larger and more beautiful. Whoever see it first cries out “I see the star!” Then, little sister drops weak and passes away. The brother’s grief and longing go on for days, and he never gives up looking at stars and waiting for going to sky to be with his sister ..
Besides this, the meaning of life is inevitable fact for we humans. Also, we can feel the essence of life in each age, and kids are luckier than us, because they never give up imaginating and feeling miracle. Finally, I wanna leave a few sentences from the story.
“.. and one night as he lay upon his bed, his children standing around, he cried, as he had cried so long ago.. ” I see the star! ” They whispered one to another ,” he is dying..” And he said , ” I am.. My age is falling from me like a garment, and I move towards the stars as a child .. And O, my Father, now I thank Thee that it has so often opened ,to receive those dear ones who await me!”
And the star was shining and it shines upon his grave..”
A Child’s Dream of A Star
by Charles Dickens
One day, a star might be shining upon our graves too.. Who knows?
Today, we mostly hear *minimalism and simplicity. Maybe,simplicity is a yearning of modern world people to the old days which had simple but peaceful moments
Well, what is minimalism?
In fact, it was a trend in sculpture and painting that arose in the 1950s, and used simple typically massive, forms.. In other saying, it is a current issuing simplicity and objectivity in modern art and music.
However, we see its effects in our daily lives. Especially, decorators and interior architects are extremely interested in simplicity. They think that simple decoration has a classy and neat atmosphere. And this life style has gotten attention of modern world which is suffering from hustle and bustle .. Today’s people prefer resting in simple and peaceful places decorated less furniture anymore. Most of us are getting to keep *the less but functional objects. Simple and handy ones.. Because, we reasonably need to use our time in a fast and easy way. Beyond these reasons, we primarily desire to have less things to survive and live. For instance , we tend to eat twice a day nowadays, and we are extremely bored of unneeded clothes in wardrobes.. Moreover, we are so lonely that we play hide and seek with ourselves among rooms. We are as if we were swallowed by all unneeded goods! Whether some of us make enough money or not, we feel need of wearing different dresses for each day. Before hiring a house , we firstly look at if it has extra large cupboards, because our shoes are sitting on head corners! Also, each family members are running to get a car , and pavements are occupied by cars day by day. The furnitures are real residents of our houses. While we are working for making much money to buy more and more, they are living instead of us! For instance,after a tiring day, we desire only a relaxing sofa and a cup of tea.
On the other hand ,our walls and every inches of our rooms are so crowded that we are like prisoners of our wealthy and showy lives! Furthermore, extra time is needed to clean and dust them. If we haven’t any time, we need helpers for all errands. So, we consume ourselves to have much money to live a luxury life .
Well, does a luxury life have to be crowded like this much?
Do we really need all of them?
Can we pass our days with a few but neat clothes?
Do we have a chance to cycle to our works?
Is a simple life really possible?
I think, it is ,but most of us need to agree on this idea. Because, we all feel more confident in our communities. So , as a society, we should change ourselves together ..Of course, everybody don’t have to agree on it. Life style is a preference.
To sum up, as long as we give up getting unnecessary things, we’ll start to realize more and free time. Instead of killing our time with shopping , designing, eating, clothing, cleaning and in traffic, we’ll save our free time to take a fresh breath and discover the nature. Sometimes, I feel hopeless because of technological innovations . The futurist brains may activate air transportation, if it is so, these days our last days to see our free and blue sky as unique peace source !
While there is still time, look at the sky, feel your freedom and catch the time! Believe me my fellow! We need less thing but more freedom !
This time..Keeping my breath..Today i am strong enough to do it!It isn’t hard as you think..Leave yourself into my deepsides..what happened?You look as if terrified!Relax,my fellow!It’ll be like sliding on the ice..Because,my inner world like icy roads,high mountains..I’ll see my dark faces with you..This is my hypocrisy which is being with others;only to spend time and not to be different from the others..They think that I’m a mad and have wise soul..It isn’t real! It is a big lie!
Now,let’s look at my innocent face under smooth skin which has rough valleys,crowded ways..It’s dangerous to drive on them and don’t stop;because we have long journey to my inner!I’m not kidding! Just kicking the reality to faces!
Whenever I try to be peaceful,an insect bites me and leaves its poison into my mind..It’s like a voice,weird voice whispering to me..
“Don’t be comfort!It’s a game that will end in a few seconds..Face to this reality and lost!How many times you saw the grief after getting your passions?And how many times you realized this blank whenever you hold the imagine wanted by you in your hands?”
Even if I hear this voice and the voice of meaningless captures my mind,I talk to myself
“I’m not hopeless..As long as i lose my passion to life,one thing is given to me as a gift..
Even if every happiness flies to blank,my spirit disasters create my unique belief!
From dear William Shakespeare
“So I return rebuk’d to my content,
And gain by ili thrice more than I have spent”
/ inspired by *once upon a time / Evgeny Grinko /
Once upon a time..
We were childreen dancing on dry leaves,
We’d already heard sound of nature.
The silent wind whispered * valse
The clouds were our sights.
Sometimes,we were serious ones;
The fearless childreen sleeping under thunders.
‘Cos,we ‘d never felt scare
But,the adults told us horror tales!
We were childreen keeping hope insides
So,we’d never closed our eyes to the stars!
The caring night hid us
The moon sent us to the stars..
Once upon a time..
We were kids singing songs loudly,
We’d already learnt to play freely.
The humble streets listened to us
The pavements were stages for us!
Sometimes,we were funny ones,
Laughing sincerely was our style.
‘Cos,we’d never done fake
And,we were all of real smiles!
We were kids..
And we are still kids who resist to grow up!
`To the nogrowers
We live the time in endless tunnel..Time is shown by tick-tocks..We are captive in a huge clock in which every second turns into minutes..The minutes are running to an hour.The hours are so proud of being a day.This is like a machine which works like gears of a wheel.
Maybe,we are out of time in real and we are explorers of imaginary time.Because,when we get out of the world to the space,the time flies to eternity in space blank.In fact,we are walking in a line which starts from the past upto future.Our past and moments are drawing the next.We are in a relative way.As long as we walk in the way,the stones of the chosen road come under our feet.The relative line becomes visible.Each step is a new start and direction.
How can we decide to choose right direction in this relative and imaginary world and time?
Sometimes,we feel the choise by the help of our past and memories.Most of time,inspires show the way.
However,we are in purgatory of past and future.Maybe,the world of moments are the real world!
Those were the days which we used to write just a few words to each other,
Because,we’d really known our hearts..
Most of time,we didn’t use to ask why?
We used to think that each word is waste of time!
So,we talked to each other with our eyes.
Those were the days which we used to cry silently not to show our tears!
Therefore,we hid them with bitter smiles..
We used to keep our secrets like treasure,
Because,we were rich of our loyalty.
Those were the days which we used to walk side by side!
So,we hesitated not to step on our shadows..
We used to believe closeness of distance,
And we lived together heart to heart!
Even if we were far away from each other..
Today,we are in vain frames on which we deplete our humble souls day by day,and we lose our tolerance to the others.Because we are busy with puffing our ego,and we insist on closing our eyes & ears!
I got some words after listening to she wolf .
Of course ,the voice of Sia is quite fascinating.Besides of this, the lyrcs are so meaningful.
“You hunted me down
Like a wolf, a predator
I felt like deer in love lights!”
A broken heart,wounded woman’s screams and feelings..As she accepts her weak moments ,in the same time, she tells her broken side to the world! She feels as if she was trapped by a hunter,and when she says that “I thought I was part of you…”,she confesses her deception under the shadow of love lights! In repeats,a severe pain is seen clearly..”I’m falling to pieces!” is the bitter end!
On the other hand, this is song of revenge.I think, she intends to collect her pieces..So, recovering herself is only possiple to face with her unfortunate deception, and show the real face of her beloved.
While she was laying with wolves,she was alone,but strong and willed.Maybe,it was the first time for her ,and she was caught suddenly.She wasn’t ready,maybe she was unexperienced ,because she was used to be ‘alone wolf’..When she believed the love and became blind by effect of the magic love lights,she turned to a deer..She hid her teeth and claws,and unfortunately she was hurt at the her weakest moment!
Well..Where does the legend of She Wolf come from? Why is female likened to a wolf? I think,it reaches to Roman mythology. According to this myth,infant twins Romulus & Remus were abandoned on the side of Tibet River. A she- wolf saved and let them suckle. We can see the monuments as symbol in Capitoline Museum in Rome.
We can also read the evolution of the she- wolf as a symbol in western history and literature.Cristina Mazzoni analyzes this symbol in The Story of a Roman Icon. Of course, She Wolf by Hector H.Munro (Saki) is also great story.To sum up,She Wolf has a remarkable impression on literature from the past until now.
Maybe, she-wolf represents the power of female.Especially it’s the symbol of hidden force and humble heart!Whenever she faces to enemy,she remembers her wild side.On the other hand, she has a huge heart to hug helpless in need.The most important thing is that she never forgives the one who exploits her feelings!
To me,each woman has soul of a wolf 🙂
What do you think?
“Be Thou my Wisdom,and Thou my true Word,
I ever with Thee and Thou with me,Lord..”
*attr.to Dallan Forgail
an Irish poem
Wisdom is our souls’ hymn,
Coming from infinite light..
Wisdom is our steps’ leader,
Walking up to endless delight.
Wisdom is hand of our *Lord,
Making us to see the right!
Eternal glory is living in our inside
If we discover this hidden treasure,
It becomes our sight!
*Thanks a lot dear Camille Nelson & Alex Sharpe ! This inspiring video Be Thou my vision is so healing for our tired souls..